Yard Work

Being a lazy bastard, I'd like to hire someone to do some yard work. Basically, fertilizing, removing weed, and trimming some plants. My front lawn is 200 sqft and my back yard is about 500 sqft. Anyone have any idea what it would cost to do that sort of work?

I haven't done any serious yard work since December so it's kind of fuggly right while my neighbor keeps her yard immaculate. I'm beginning to suspect that woman is a robot.

Hey Chief, do you not realize yard work=quality beer drinkin' time?

Hey Chief, do you not realize yard work=quality beer drinkin' time?
You have it! Time to cut grass, trim, and blow off sidewalks 35 minutes. Time the wife thinks it takes to do this job 2 hours. That leaves me 1 1/2 hours to have a few beers. Yes, it takes the entire 2 hours but I work a little then drink a little , work a little then drink a little. Then finish by breaking a little sweat then you can say " Honey, its hot out here and I'm tired could you hand me a beer". She will get me one or two because I worked so hard allowing this job to last a good 2 1/2 hours. Now you don't have to listen to her yelling about the yard and you have quality time for your self.

Hey Chief, do you not realize yard work=quality beer drinkin' time?

Yard work IS beer drinking time! That's why lawn tractors come with cup holders!