Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear

BDBohnzie · 05-23-2008, 10:18 AM

Question: What kind of bear is best?
That's a ridiculous question.
False. Black Bear.
Well that's debatable, there are basically two schools of thought..
Fact: Bears eat beets.
Oh..
Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica!

Hog1 · 05-23-2008, 10:48 AM

OMG............the off-season BLOWS

Riggo44 · 05-23-2008, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paintrain

ARE would have him until he pulls up lame with a hamstring at the 5 yard line, then it's all bear.

No doubt!

firstdown · 05-23-2008, 11:17 AM

I wrestled a bear back in the 80's when I was at a fesitval for $5.00 (my cost to get in the ring). It was not a hugh bear and I'm not very big but I did not even stand a chance. That bear knock me from one side of the ring to the next. After about a minute I gave up. I watched several guys get in the ring and it did not seem to matter how big the person the bear won everytime. I'm sure its illegal now days for people to do this with bears but it was declawed and had on a mussle.

Mattyk72 · 05-23-2008, 11:58 AM

Sean Taylor would have ate the bear for breakfast and asked for seconds.

hooskins · 05-23-2008, 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FRPLG

I can think of no better man to test this out than Pacman Jones. I say if he beats the bear let him back in the league. If not....

hahaa yes.

But in all reality bears are quite nimble and they can run faster. If the bear was hungry, and ARE had meat in his hand instead of a ball, he would die. The bear would charge, ARE would run towards him, they meet at the 25, 30ish, and ARE makes a cut, gets opens starts running, bear turns around and catches up and owns him at around the opponents 40, or 35.

hooskins · 05-23-2008, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BDBohnzie

Question: What kind of bear is best?
That's a ridiculous question.
False. Black Bear.
Well that's debatable, there are basically two schools of thought..
Fact: Bears eat beets.
Oh..
Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica!

LOL exactly what I was thinking.

hooskins · 05-23-2008, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by firstdown

I wrestled a bear back in the 80's when I was at a fesitval for $5.00 (my cost to get in the ring). It was not a hugh bear and I'm not very big but I did not even stand a chance. That bear knock me from one side of the ring to the next. After about a minute I gave up. I watched several guys get in the ring and it did not seem to matter how big the person the bear won everytime. I'm sure its illegal now days for people to do this with bears but it was declawed and had on a mussle.

That is kinda badass, but I am sure nowadays that has animal rights violation written all over it.

Monksdown · 05-23-2008, 02:14 PM

ARE with a spear wins every time. Find a convenient pole vault mount. Call the bear dirty names until he charges you. Place blunt end of spear behind you in pole vault mount. Aim for his heart as he charges, which means low, and lift as he crashes into you. And then i hope you've been saved, because you're both going to meet jesus.

ArtMonkDrillz · 05-23-2008, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monksdown

ARE with a spear wins every time. Find a convenient pole vault mount. Call the bear dirty names until he charges you. Place blunt end of spear behind you in pole vault mount. Aim for his heart as he charges, which means low, and lift as he crashes into you. And then i hope you've been saved, because you're both going to meet jesus.

You just watched the movie The Edge with Anthony Hopkins, didn't you?

ArtMonkDrillz · 05-23-2008, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BDBohnzie

Question: What kind of bear is best?
That's a ridiculous question.
False. Black Bear.
Well that's debatable, there are basically two schools of thought..
Fact: Bears eat beets.
Oh..
Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica!

Millions of people are affect my identity theft you know!!!

Monksdown · 05-23-2008, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtMonkDrillz

You just watched the movie The Edge with Anthony Hopkins, didn't you?

Not recently, but you did see to the heart of my argument. His wife was money....

Can't miss an Alec Baldwin movie.

saden1 · 05-24-2008, 03:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chrisl4064

In all reality by the time the bear starts running fast hes got 40 yards to catch him. ARE wins.

and btw the most effective way to run from a bear is downhill....

This is an easy high school physics problem. If we know what the runner's and bear's acceleration are we can more accurately calculate how long it would take the bear to catch the runner. Here's the math if we make some assumptions along with the limited information we've been given.

Given:

Assume constant acceleration of 0. We have to assume this because we don't have this information, we only have speed and the problem can't be solved accurately without the acceleration information.
Randle El (a.k.a. "The Foolish One") who runs 9.09 yards per seconds (he has 4.49s 40 time).
The Bear (a.k.a. "The Mauler") who runs 14.66 yards per seconds (30 mph = 14.66 y/s).
Assume it's a 100 yard straight-line race between "The Mauler" and "The Foolish One" who is running for his life (or was, may he RIP).

Result:

Assuming they both start at the 1 yard line...after 4 seconds The Foolish One will be at the ~37.4 yard line, The Mauler will be at the ~59.6 yard line....ohh the horror!
Assuming The Mauler started at 1 yard line and The Foolish One gets a head start at the 39 yard line...The Foolish One will get mauled Kevin Dyson style at the one yard line after ~6.68 seconds.

There you have it ladies and gentlemen, math doesn't lie. Even if you give The Foolish One decent acceleration, Vick/Hester speed, and a 30 yard head start he'd still get f*cked up before he scores a TD or reaches safety.

05-23-2008, 10:18 AM	#16 (permalink)
BDBohnzie Playmaker Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Frederick, MD Posts: 3,254	Re: Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear Question: What kind of bear is best? That's a ridiculous question. False. Black Bear. Well that's debatable, there are basically two schools of thought.. Fact: Bears eat beets. Oh.. Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica! __________________ Bad Things man, I mean bad things... EE21 is on a roll this week...it's too bad you can't give positive rep points anymore ;) I think the right thing to do would have been to salute the flag with my right hand and pelt her in the face with a tomato or shoe with my left. You shouldn't trust people who try to F you. Especially when you're married.

05-23-2008, 10:48 AM	#17 (permalink)
Hog1 Playmaker Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Naples, Florida Posts: 2,976	Re: Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear OMG............the off-season BLOWS __________________ Goodbye Sean..........Vaya Con Dios thankyou Joe....... "I hold up the nose [tackle], and Jansen just comes down and kills him," Rabach said

05-23-2008, 11:17 AM	#19 (permalink)
firstdown Pro Bowl Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: chesapeake, va Posts: 5,086	Re: Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear I wrestled a bear back in the 80's when I was at a fesitval for $5.00 (my cost to get in the ring). It was not a hugh bear and I'm not very big but I did not even stand a chance. That bear knock me from one side of the ring to the next. After about a minute I gave up. I watched several guys get in the ring and it did not seem to matter how big the person the bear won everytime. I'm sure its illegal now days for people to do this with bears but it was declawed and had on a mussle.

05-23-2008, 11:58 AM	#20 (permalink)
Mattyk72 50 gut upside your head Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: NY Posts: 30,689	Re: Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear Sean Taylor would have ate the bear for breakfast and asked for seconds. __________________ Warpath VIP \| Hail to the Hall of Famer \| Warpath Shop \| Burgundy Army

05-23-2008, 02:14 PM	#24 (permalink)
Monksdown Overrated Fantasy Analyst Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Warrenton, VA Posts: 898	Re: Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear ARE with a spear wins every time. Find a convenient pole vault mount. Call the bear dirty names until he charges you. Place blunt end of spear behind you in pole vault mount. Aim for his heart as he charges, which means low, and lift as he crashes into you. And then i hope you've been saved, because you're both going to meet jesus. __________________ Love, Me

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Antwaan Randle El vs. 900 pound bear

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