[Dave Butz Baby!]

Radio Free since 1997. I remember it very well. It was first thing in the morning, and I had just walked into the office that I shared w/ a hottie. I remember it was a nice spring day...

I turned on the radio that sat on her desk. She had it tuned to the rock station. Chumbawamba's "Tubthumping" comes blaring out of the speakers. Man, talk about musical drivel... it sounds like wet shit hitting concrete. I hate that effing song.

"I get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down...."

I had to make the burning in my ears stop, so I switched to the next preset - the 'alternative' station. Tubthumping was on that station too.

"Pissing the night away,
Pissing the night away...."

Getting really annoyed, I hit the next preset on the radio - Top 40 station. Tubthumping.

"He drinks a whiskey drink
He drinks a vodka drink
He drinks a lager drink
He drinks a cider drink
He sings the songs that remind him of the good times
He sings the songs that remind him of the better times...."

Now I'm ready to cry. Next button... I'm pretty sure it was the dance station. Even freakin' Madonna would be better than this. Better in the exact same way that getting kicked in the knee will totally make you forget your headache for a moment.

Not a chance. I went four for four in thirty seconds. Here comes the chorus!

"I get knocked down, but I get up again
You're never gonna keep me down...."

It's the musical cockroach. Post-apocalypse, it'll be the only song left.