Funny Sean Taylor Facts...

Schneed10 · 01-04-2006, 04:42 PM

Brokeback Mountain's script originally detailed the sexual exploits of two very manly Cowboys who prowled the countryside looking for panties to drop. The script had to be rewritten to more accurately portray modern-day Cowboys, because thanks to Sean Taylor, straight Cowboys no longer exist.

BrudLee · 01-04-2006, 04:45 PM

Like a modern day Dr. Moreau, Sean Taylor can combine men with beasts. Currently, he's giving wide receivers the arms of alligators.

Schneed10 · 01-04-2006, 04:57 PM

Video of Sean Taylor's bone-crunching hit on Patrick Crayton was used as the basis for the newest fatalities in Mortal Combat. But the FCC declared that the game was too violent and had to be toned down. The FCC chairman has since been found dead, apparently due to helmet-to-helmet related causes.

FRPLG · 01-04-2006, 05:00 PM

Sean Taylor is Keiser Sose.

JoeRedskin · 01-04-2006, 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FRPLG

Sean Taylor is Keiser Sose.

Now THAT's a good one.

mooby · 01-04-2006, 06:12 PM

Sean Taylor is such a bad ass he'll tell his girlfriend the truth when she asks: do these jeans make my butt look fat?

This one time in band camp. . . Taylor played with a girls flute while she was blowing his trombone.

Sean Taylor was the man who invented the peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

When they first landed on the moon, they found 3 empty gatorade bottles and Sean Taylor's wallet.

Sean Taylor's semen can form into a liquid human, like the guy from Terminator 2.

S.T.'s such a good snowmobile salesman that he sold an entire fleet of snowmobiles yesterday to the City of Phoenix road maintenance division.

Taylor once breast fed an alligator back to health, then beat it one on one in basketball 21-0.

Taylor once saved me $100 bucks on my car insurance.

It was Taylor's idea to put porn on the internet.

Dont be fooled by what they try to teach you in history class: The Earl of Sandwich had nothing to do with the creation of the sandwich. Contrary to popular belief, it was actually Sean Taylor, who incedentally also created sliced bread, at the same time.

Ever wonder who really framed Roger Rabbit? wonder no more.

Sean Taylor was the gunman in the Grassy Knoll.

Sean Taylor once cut his left arm off and gave it to Michael Vick because he felt sorry for him.

The other night Sean Taylor had a staring contest with the man on the moon. S.T. won.

Sean Taylor sweats Gatorade.

In a parallel universe S.T. has already achieved NFL hall of fame status, and is now poised to do the same here.

Spiderman is really a movie about Sean Taylor's childhood.

Sean Taylor learned Spanish during vacation time he spent in Mexico just after he negotiated the Louisiana Purchase.

Sean Taylor can turn lead into gold.

Canton is gonna wave the five year rule and put him in the HOF this july.

Taylor not only developed the back to the future skateboard this summer but also discovered cold fusion in his spare time.

S.T. sold his blood to Pfizer - who now markets that a derivative of it under the name Viagra.

S.T. sits on the Supreme Court, is a senator from New York, and a representative from Florida.

S.T. e-mailed me the Nordstroms chocolate cookie recipe (that he created BTW) and I made them for a potluck at work.....I got promoted instantly

onlydarksets · 01-04-2006, 07:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by steveo395

http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty

My favorites:
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Sean Taylor.
Sean Taylor ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

FRPLG · 01-04-2006, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JoeRedskin

Now THAT's a good one.

And like that...he's gone.

FRPLG · 01-04-2006, 07:28 PM

Wanna know what keeps that damn bunny going in those battery commercials? It isn't their crappy batteries. It's his fear of Sean Taylor.

Sammy Baugh Fan · 01-04-2006, 07:48 PM

Sean Taylor not asked to Pro Bowl because Hawaii was afraid.

JoeRedskin · 01-04-2006, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sammy Baugh Fan

Sean Taylor not asked to Pro Bowl because Hawaii was afraid.

Word

BrudLee · 01-04-2006, 08:11 PM

Sean Taylor's a 10 foot-tall beast-man, who showers in vodka, and feeds his baby shrimp scampi.

Sean Taylor orchestrated the merger between UNICEF and Smith and Wesson.

Sean Taylor once hosted the Grammy's and gave every award to Corey Hart.

Sean Taylor's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Neil Armstrong.

Did I ever tell you about the time I went horseback riding with Sean Taylor, but there weren't any horses around? Well, Taylor throws a saddle on my back and rides me around Wyoming for three days. Well wouldn't you know it my stamina increases with each day and I develop tremendous leg muscles. So anyway, Taylor decides to enter me in the Breeders Cup, right? Under the name Turkish Delight. And I'm running in second place, and I'm running and I BREAK MY ANKLE. So anyway they're about to shoot me. Then someone from the crowd yells out, God bless him, don't shoot him he's a human.

Sean Taylor once showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw!

BrudLee · 01-04-2006, 08:12 PM

"His poop is used as currency in Argentina."

EternalEnigma21 · 01-04-2006, 08:18 PM

I wondered when brasky was going to rear his ugly head LOL

Sammy Baugh Fan · 01-04-2006, 08:19 PM

Al Gore admits that Sean Taylor actually invented the Internet not him.

01-04-2006, 04:42 PM	#46
Schneed10 A Dude Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Newtown Square, PA Age: 46 Posts: 12,458	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Brokeback Mountain's script originally detailed the sexual exploits of two very manly Cowboys who prowled the countryside looking for panties to drop. The script had to be rewritten to more accurately portray modern-day Cowboys, because thanks to Sean Taylor, straight Cowboys no longer exist.

01-04-2006, 04:45 PM	#47
BrudLee Playmaker Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Rehoboth Beach, DE Posts: 3,494	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Like a modern day Dr. Moreau, Sean Taylor can combine men with beasts. Currently, he's giving wide receivers the arms of alligators. __________________ There's nowhere to go but up. Or down. I guess we could stay where we are, too.

01-04-2006, 04:57 PM	#48
Schneed10 A Dude Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Newtown Square, PA Age: 46 Posts: 12,458	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Video of Sean Taylor's bone-crunching hit on Patrick Crayton was used as the basis for the newest fatalities in Mortal Combat. But the FCC declared that the game was too violent and had to be toned down. The FCC chairman has since been found dead, apparently due to helmet-to-helmet related causes.

01-04-2006, 05:00 PM	#49
FRPLG MVP Join Date: May 2004 Age: 46 Posts: 10,164	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Sean Taylor is Keiser Sose.

01-04-2006, 06:12 PM	#51
mooby Hug Anne Spyder Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 20,577	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Sean Taylor is such a bad ass he'll tell his girlfriend the truth when she asks: do these jeans make my butt look fat? This one time in band camp. . . Taylor played with a girls flute while she was blowing his trombone. Sean Taylor was the man who invented the peanut butter and jelly sandwich. When they first landed on the moon, they found 3 empty gatorade bottles and Sean Taylor's wallet. Sean Taylor's semen can form into a liquid human, like the guy from Terminator 2. S.T.'s such a good snowmobile salesman that he sold an entire fleet of snowmobiles yesterday to the City of Phoenix road maintenance division. Taylor once breast fed an alligator back to health, then beat it one on one in basketball 21-0. Taylor once saved me $100 bucks on my car insurance. It was Taylor's idea to put porn on the internet. Dont be fooled by what they try to teach you in history class: The Earl of Sandwich had nothing to do with the creation of the sandwich. Contrary to popular belief, it was actually Sean Taylor, who incedentally also created sliced bread, at the same time. Ever wonder who really framed Roger Rabbit? wonder no more. Sean Taylor was the gunman in the Grassy Knoll. Sean Taylor once cut his left arm off and gave it to Michael Vick because he felt sorry for him. The other night Sean Taylor had a staring contest with the man on the moon. S.T. won. Sean Taylor sweats Gatorade. In a parallel universe S.T. has already achieved NFL hall of fame status, and is now poised to do the same here. Spiderman is really a movie about Sean Taylor's childhood. Sean Taylor learned Spanish during vacation time he spent in Mexico just after he negotiated the Louisiana Purchase. Sean Taylor can turn lead into gold. Canton is gonna wave the five year rule and put him in the HOF this july. Taylor not only developed the back to the future skateboard this summer but also discovered cold fusion in his spare time. S.T. sold his blood to Pfizer - who now markets that a derivative of it under the name Viagra. S.T. sits on the Supreme Court, is a senator from New York, and a representative from Florida. S.T. e-mailed me the Nordstroms chocolate cookie recipe (that he created BTW) and I made them for a potluck at work.....I got promoted instantly __________________ Hail to the Football Team

01-04-2006, 07:28 PM	#54
FRPLG MVP Join Date: May 2004 Age: 46 Posts: 10,164	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Wanna know what keeps that damn bunny going in those battery commercials? It isn't their crappy batteries. It's his fear of Sean Taylor.

01-04-2006, 07:48 PM	#55
Sammy Baugh Fan Playmaker Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Northern Virginia, Woodbridge Age: 63 Posts: 2,507	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Sean Taylor not asked to Pro Bowl because Hawaii was afraid. __________________ Check out Mike Hedrick - The Next Food Network Star. Please Click and give me a Thumbs Up and Positive Comment. Thanks

01-04-2006, 08:11 PM	#57
BrudLee Playmaker Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Rehoboth Beach, DE Posts: 3,494	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Sean Taylor's a 10 foot-tall beast-man, who showers in vodka, and feeds his baby shrimp scampi. Sean Taylor orchestrated the merger between UNICEF and Smith and Wesson. Sean Taylor once hosted the Grammy's and gave every award to Corey Hart. Sean Taylor's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Neil Armstrong. Did I ever tell you about the time I went horseback riding with Sean Taylor, but there weren't any horses around? Well, Taylor throws a saddle on my back and rides me around Wyoming for three days. Well wouldn't you know it my stamina increases with each day and I develop tremendous leg muscles. So anyway, Taylor decides to enter me in the Breeders Cup, right? Under the name Turkish Delight. And I'm running in second place, and I'm running and I BREAK MY ANKLE. So anyway they're about to shoot me. Then someone from the crowd yells out, God bless him, don't shoot him he's a human. Sean Taylor once showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw! __________________ There's nowhere to go but up. Or down. I guess we could stay where we are, too.

01-04-2006, 08:12 PM	#58
BrudLee Playmaker Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Rehoboth Beach, DE Posts: 3,494	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... "His poop is used as currency in Argentina." __________________ There's nowhere to go but up. Or down. I guess we could stay where we are, too.

01-04-2006, 08:18 PM	#59
EternalEnigma21 Assistant Regional Mod Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Carbondale CO Age: 45 Posts: 2,958	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... I wondered when brasky was going to rear his ugly head LOL

01-04-2006, 08:19 PM	#60
Sammy Baugh Fan Playmaker Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Northern Virginia, Woodbridge Age: 63 Posts: 2,507	Re: Funny Sean Taylor Facts... Al Gore admits that Sean Taylor actually invented the Internet not him. __________________ Check out Mike Hedrick - The Next Food Network Star. Please Click and give me a Thumbs Up and Positive Comment. Thanks

Funny Sean Taylor Facts...

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