Wife Question: Dropping Momma' at the Plane

[TheMalcolmConnection]

Very good advice. And seriously, this is one of the reasons we DON'T want kids right now. LOL

That sounds very similar.

[TheMalcolmConnection]

I mean I DO agree with my wife's point that it would basically cost nothing for the 4 people I'm taking to split the parking bill, not to mention all the people it's inconveniencing to take them to and from.

But what I am supposed to do? Tell my family, "Well, why don't you just take yourselves?"

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by TheMalcolmConnection

I mean I DO agree with my wife's point that it would basically cost nothing for the 4 people I'm taking to split the parking bill, not to mention all the people it's inconveniencing to take them to and from.

But what I am supposed to do? Tell my family, "Well, why don't you just take yourselves?"

Yup it is inconvenient but it is a scenario that will keep coming up so you push through it and know you have a token next time you need help.

Look at this way and how I get through annoying stuff. Think of SmoothSmack how much would he want to be able right now to drive his health mom to the airport for her to enjoy a vacation, I bet more then anything else.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by TheMalcolmConnection

I mean I DO agree with my wife's point that it would basically cost nothing for the 4 people I'm taking to split the parking bill, not to mention all the people it's inconveniencing to take them to and from.

But what I am supposed to do? Tell my family, "Well, why don't you just take yourselves?"

Actually, in your case, that's exactly what I'd do.

My in-laws are down in Orlando, so I only see them a few times a year. But my mom, dad, stepmom, and stepdad all live within 4 miles of my wife and me. My mom, bless her heart, is a little nuts. She's just very hyper, and she ADORES my wife (the daughter she never had kind of thing). She's always asking us to come over and do this or that, or meet her out to do this and that...

Sometimes you just have to say no. My wife and I are both really focused on our careers right now and working a lot, so we don't have much free time together. I sure don't want to spend the bulk of it hanging out with my Mom. Going over for dinner a few times a month is fine, but sometimes she's just over the top with all her requests.

You could easily just tell your Mom that you and the wife need some time just the two of you, and that you can't accommodate her request this time. Like you said, it's totally reasonable that they split the parking. I don't think that's a big "FU" to your Mom as you said. I mean, if your Mom was disabled or something, then that's different.

Anyway man, it will all work out. You'll be having sexicans again before you know it.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by GMScud

Actually, in your case, that's exactly what I'd do.

My in-laws are down in Orlando, so I only see them a few times a year. But my mom, dad, stepmom, and stepdad all live within 4 miles of my wife and me. My mom, bless her heart, is a little nuts. She's just very hyper, and she ADORES my wife (the daughter she never had kind of thing). She's always asking us to come over and do this or that, or meet her out to do this and that...

Sometimes you just have to say no. My wife and I are both really focused on our careers right now and working a lot, so we don't have much free time together. I sure don't want to spend the bulk of it hanging out with my Mom. Going over for dinner a few times a month is fine, but sometimes she's just over the top with all her requests.

You could easily just tell your Mom that you and the wife need some time just the two of you, and that you can't accommodate her request this time. Like you said, it's totally reasonable that they split the parking. I don't think that's a big "FU" to your Mom as you said. I mean, if your Mom was disabled or something, then that's different.

Anyway man, it will all work out. You'll be having sexicans again before you know it.

Newlywed,

Oh grasshopper much to learn.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Newlywed,

Oh grasshopper much to learn.

Actually it has nothing to do with being a newlywed. My wife and I have been together 7 years and living together most of that time, so the fact that we recently tied the knot is pretty irrelevant here.

I'm not saying TMC is wrong for taking his family to the airport, just saying that it seems like it wouldn't have been a big deal at all for them to find their own way to the airport, and then his wife wouldn't be upset (however she shouldn't be this upset anyway). Wasn't it you who told me in a thread a while back, "happy wife, happy life?"

Anyway, 3 of the 7 years my wife and I have been together, we've been living very close to my family. Plus my parents are divorced/re-married, so I have two sets of parents here that always want to see us. So over these 3 years I've learned that there's a balance that needs to be found. Sometimes I simply have to turn down invites in order to spend some quality time with the wife. And sometimes when I accept invites, the wife gets a little annoyed, but I think I've almost got it down to a science at this point.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by GMScud

Actually it has nothing to do with being a newlywed. My wife and I have been together 7 years and living together most of that time, so the fact that we recently tied the knot is pretty irrelevant here.

I'm not saying TMC is wrong for taking his family to the airport, just saying that it seems like it wouldn't have been a big deal at all for them to find their own way to the airport, and then his wife wouldn't be upset (however she shouldn't be this upset anyway). Wasn't it you who told me in a thread a while back, "happy wife, happy life?"

Anyway, 3 of the 7 years my wife and I have been together, we've been living very close to my family. Plus my parents are divorced/re-married, so I have to sets of parents here that always want to see us. So over these 3 years I've learned that there's a balance that needs to be found. Sometimes I simply have to turn down invites in order to spend some quality time with the wife. And sometimes when I accept invites, the wife gets a little annoyed, but I think I've almost got it down to a science at this point.

For the record I was just giving you a hard time. there is no right answer only TMC knows the right answer since he knows all the parties.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by GMScud

Actually it has nothing to do with being a newlywed. My wife and I have been together 7 years and living together most of that time, so the fact that we recently tied the knot is pretty irrelevant here.

I'm not saying TMC is wrong for taking his family to the airport, just saying that it seems like it wouldn't have been a big deal at all for them to find their own way to the airport, and then his wife wouldn't be upset (however she shouldn't be this upset anyway). Wasn't it you who told me in a thread a while back, "happy wife, happy life?"

Anyway, 3 of the 7 years my wife and I have been together, we've been living very close to my family. Plus my parents are divorced/re-married, so I have two sets of parents here that always want to see us. So over these 3 years I've learned that there's a balance that needs to be found. Sometimes I simply have to turn down invites in order to spend some quality time with the wife. And sometimes when I accept invites, the wife gets a little annoyed, but I think I've almost got it down to a science at this point.

Just to clarify here, I don't want to sound like an ingrate. I am TOTALLY blessed to have such great parents/step-parents, and it's in no way any type of chore to spend time with them. I love it. But I just have to find a balance to keep everyone happy, including myself.

After reading the part in bold, I feel like I came off pretty selfish.

[Monkeydad]

^ Is true.

We'll act without thinking, they'll speak without thinking. It's life.

[mredskins]

Just imagine how many battles like this is going on in the world right now.

For me and I think most guys as well you always get blindside by crap like this.

My poor brother in-law (my sisters husband) is taking a huge hit right now. They have a new born at home and he is pretty grumpy (like most people in that situation becasue you are basically going without sleep) so my sister complains to my mom about him. So my mom is like what a dirt bag etc.... I told my mom go easy on him it is a tough time in their lives and know that I am a dirt bag at times in my mother in-laws eyes.

[GhettoDogAllStars]

For the record, "Droppin' Momma at the Plane" sounds like a movie with Martin Lawrence in it.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by GhettoDogAllStars

For the record, "Droppin' Momma at the Plane" sounds like a movie with Martin Lawrence in it.

Still better then "Throw Momma from the Train" , maybe that is what TMC's wife wants to do to her.

[Trample the Elderly]

I don't understand why you feel that you need to explain yourself to your wife or anyone else? I respect my friends who rule the roost and ridicule the ones who let their wives run rough shod all over em.

My homeboy Jody tells his wife what's up and his kids are well behaved. I don't envision them getting a divorce, ever.

My hommie Bryan let's his wife break his ass down Cool Hand Luke style. His kids are always crying when they don't get what they want. They go to relationship "therapy". I expect them to divorce as soon as their kids are out of the house, maybe sooner.

Men should act like men.

If I was you, I wouldn't budge. It's not like you're being unreasonable. Although, I'm old school, and in my book the wife comes before the kids and the parents, etc. I'm sure you'll make the best choice in what you do but I wouldn't argue. Tell it like it is and stick to your guns.

Anytimes I need male advice I consult these guys.

The Art of Manliness | Men's Interests and Lifestyle

[BDBohnzie]

Been there, done that, was the mayor of that town for a while. I walk that tightrope that connects my wife and mother constantly, and for a while, I was walking while twirling blazing sticks of fire. But eventually I figured out the balance and haven't had too many issues since.

TMC - it's a losing battle. As it's been stated before, it's not because you are taking your family to the airport, it's because she had it all planned out that you guys were going to spend the weekend together or whatever it is that couples without children do (man how I long for those days sometimes), and this little cog burst her bubble. It could also be that she was going to surprise you with something? Either way, she's upset and somehow, you have to be the hero and make things right. And naturally, while you don't necessarily want to be, you have to be the voice of reason. You aren't going to tell your Mom no, but you want to make it up to your wife the best way you can, and let her know that.

She will get over it, but as you suggested (and continue to suggest), she could always come along and you guys could stay overnight somewhere (I assume you're taking the 'rents to Roanoke), perhaps somewhere you guys have never been before. Make the best of the situation.

[TheMalcolmConnection]

Originally Posted by BDBohnzie

Been there, done that, was the mayor of that town for a while. I walk that tightrope that connects my wife and mother constantly, and for a while, I was walking while twirling blazing sticks of fire. But eventually I figured out the balance and haven't had too many issues since.

TMC - it's a losing battle. As it's been stated before, it's not because you are taking your family to the airport, it's because she had it all planned out that you guys were going to spend the weekend together or whatever it is that couples without children do (man how I long for those days sometimes), and this little cog burst her bubble. It could also be that she was going to surprise you with something? Either way, she's upset and somehow, you have to be the hero and make things right. And naturally, while you don't necessarily want to be, you have to be the voice of reason. You aren't going to tell your Mom no, but you want to make it up to your wife the best way you can, and let her know that.

She will get over it, but as you suggested (and continue to suggest), she could always come along and you guys could stay overnight somewhere (I assume you're taking the 'rents to Roanoke), perhaps somewhere you guys have never been before. Make the best of the situation.

This is exactly right. I've offered that as a solution. I said we can do a weekend next week, but no, it's THIS weekend only to her. I'm really trying to take the high road here, and I've been the one communicating, really trying to reach out and she wants no part of it.