advice needed...

[hooskins]

So what is the situation like now?

[jsarno]

Originally Posted by hooskins

So what is the situation like now?

Well, I know the situation is still early, but its going great. Taking the kiddos to Chuck E Cheese today. We are extremely happy together, and the kids call me papi. I love that. Julia is amazed at how well they have taken to me. It's likely the attention I give them, and how happy both of us are, and they notice the difference. We both clearly made the right choice, even though we are still not out of the woods yet.
It's amazing how life brightens up when you are loved and give love.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by jsarno

Well, I know the situation is still early, but its going great. Taking the kiddos to Chuck E Cheese today. We are extremely happy together, and the kids call me papi. I love that. Julia is amazed at how well they have taken to me. It's likely the attention I give them, and how happy both of us are, and they notice the difference. We both clearly made the right choice, even though we are still not out of the woods yet.
It's amazing how life brightens up when you are loved and give love.

Seriously we are supoose to beleive this. After knowing the kids for a few months and only during short visits you have them calling you "papi" as though you were their dad. Man, you are royal piece of shit. If I was that dad I would have your crazy bi-polar ass in the hospital by now!

[dmek25]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Seriously we are supoose to beleive this. After knowing the kids for a few months and only during short visits you have them calling you "papi" as though you were their dad. Man, you are royal piece of shit. If I was that dad I would have your crazy bi-polar ass in the hospital by now!

what the heck is that all about? and congrats jsarno, i hope it all works out

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Seriously we are supoose to beleive this. After knowing the kids for a few months and only during short visits you have them calling you "papi" as though you were their dad. Man, you are royal piece of shit. If I was that dad I would have your crazy bi-polar ass in the hospital by now!

What the hell is that about????

[SmootSmack]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Seriously we are supoose to beleive this. After knowing the kids for a few months and only during short visits you have them calling you "papi" as though you were their dad. Man, you are royal piece of shit. If I was that dad I would have your crazy bi-polar ass in the hospital by now!

Goodness man, can't help but wonder if you've been "that dad" before

Approve or not, not sure calling jsarno a royal piece of shit adds anything here

[saden1]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Seriously we are supoose to beleive this. After knowing the kids for a few months and only during short visits you have them calling you "papi" as though you were their dad. Man, you are royal piece of shit. If I was that dad I would have your crazy bi-polar ass in the hospital by now!

LOL...someone done stole your love and kids too? Time to get over it and be all the man you can be.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Seriously we are supoose to beleive this. After knowing the kids for a few months and only during short visits you have them calling you "papi" as though you were their dad. Man, you are royal piece of shit. If I was that dad I would have your crazy bi-polar ass in the hospital by now!

If you disagree with his situation or flat out don't believe him, why not just refrain from posting on this thread? At the end of the day we're all just nothing more than usernames to each other. To come at him with insults seems like a pretty big waste of time IMO.

[mredskins]

^ Nope never been left out in the cold but if you are a parent and you can imangine someone coming along and taking your kids from you and "stealing" your daddy title you would be more then pissed. If you don't have kids you can pretend to understand but really any parent here wil ltell you that is one of the lows things going. To think of someone else raising my child pains me to no end.

The POS comment was probably over the top and I apologize.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by mredskins

^ Nope never been left out in the cold but if you are a parent and you can imangine someone coming along and taking your kids from you and "stealing" your daddy title you would be more then pissed. If you don't have kids you can pretend to understand but really any parent here wil ltell you that is one of the lows things going. To think of someone else raising my child pains me to no end.

The POS comment was probably over the top and I apologize.

Yeah but if everything Jsarno is saying is the truth, this guy has had ample opportunity to be a good father/husband and has failed thus far. Hopefully he'll still be a part of his kids' lives, but it sounds like he has to make some changes.

Look, shit happens. My parents divorced when I was 14 and my brother was 10. It was tough, but leading up to the split they were both so unhappy in their marriage, and it trickled down to me and my brother. It was tough and awkward for a while, especially when my Dad started dating other women right away. Sure they both made some mistakes. Who doesn't in life? They have both since re-married, and I went from having two miserable parents to having four very happy parents.

[firstdown]

Originally Posted by GMScud

Yeah but if everything Jsarno is saying is the truth, this guy has had ample opportunity to be a good father/husband and has failed thus far. Hopefully he'll still be a part of his kids' lives, but it sounds like he has to make some changes.

Look, shit happens. My parents divorced when I was 14 and my brother was 10. It was tough, but leading up to the split they were both so unhappy in their marriage, and it trickled down to me and my brother. It was tough and awkward for a while, especially when my Dad started dating other women right away. Sure they both made some mistakes. Who doesn't in life? They have both since re-married, and I went from having two miserable parents to having four very happy parents.

If I'm reading this right you think he had child with his first wife which I think is not the case but I have only read about 90% of this thread.

[KLHJ2]

Originally Posted by firstdown

If I'm reading this right you think he had child with his first wife which I think is not the case but I have only read about 90% of this thread.

He had a daughter with his first wife. With much respect I utter the words "She is Deceased". Tread carefully my friend.

Edit: And actually GM was talking about the other guy and not J.

[jsarno]

Originally Posted by Angry

He had a daughter with his first wife. With much respect I utter the words "She is Deceased". Tread carefully my friend.

Thank you Angry.

In regards to comments from others. I did not pick out the name papi, julia did. Yes, it was in reference to David Ortiz...I AM from Boston after all, and unfortunately I have a similar stature. The youngest did call me "DADDY" once and I corrected him. I have already said on this site I am not trying to replace their father and I want him to be a part of their life.

One comment stuck out to me...I think it was from GM, but please correct me if I am wrong. That I was (paraphrasing) a horrible father and husband. I didn't have a chance to be a horrible, or good father, my daughter died shortly after birth 5 years ago. That was our 1 and only shot at a child as she (my ex) had massive complications to the point that she couldn't have any other children. As a husband, not sure how you would know I was horrible considering how much I put up with. You didn't know the situation, and having an 11+ year marriage and an ex wife that is still wanting me back (with lots of counseling) I'd have to say that I was a damn good husband. Why people feel the need to insert their own assumptions is beyond me. Someone said this thread is about "advice needed" and you need to understand there will be the other side to the story (again paraphrasing), and I completely understand this. I have listened to everyone on this thread except 1 person (who has been verbally abusive), and while some were negative, I still listened. I understand I am not doing what is deemed "appropriate", or "right". This is an uphill battle for me, and for Julia. The kids are of the utmost importance to BOTH OF US, and we have them as our focal point on a DAILY basis. A lot of the comments here have gone WAAAAY beyond "advice needed". To those that have maintained the course, I thank you. Negative or not, I thank you. I need to hear both sides of the story so I know what to expect and can make better judgements because I have a fuller picture.
For those that have been positive, I sincerely appreciate your well wishes, and comments. This situation is hard enough as it is. Like SS pointed out, I don't know any of you (except 2), and likely never will. I understand I am striking a cord with some of you, and for some, that is an issue for your counselor, for others I get it. I have stayed away from any retorts cause I understand this is not an ideal situation, and it's touchy to some. To those that are taking this too close to heart, the only advice I can give you (not that you want my advice) is to take care of your own situation. Worry about the skeletons in your own closet. Treat those close to you and around you right and you wont be in this situation. I honestly don't wish this on anyone, and anyone that has been through this (from either side) knows this sucks and is not easy. It's so easy to cast a stone at someone for doing something wrong, and lets face it, this situation is an EASY TARGET, but don't worry about the splinter in my eye when there may just be a log in yours.
Again, I apologize to all of those I may have offended, I assure you that was not the intent of this thread. Any advice, good or bad, wise or not, positive or negative is certainly welcomed and absorbed.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by firstdown

If I'm reading this right you think he had child with his first wife which I think is not the case but I have only read about 90% of this thread.

I think you misread my post. I was referring to Julia's ex-husband being the biological father of the two children currently calling Jsarno "dad." I know Jsarno didn't have kids with his ex-wife.

[firstdown]

Originally Posted by GMScud

I think you misread my post. I was referring to Julia's ex-husband being the biological father of the two children currently calling Jsarno "dad." I know Jsarno didn't have kids with his ex-wife.

I read your post again and now it makes more sense. I still have not seen the post where the kids are calling him dad but I did see where they are calling him pappi. As I said earlier I don't relate the word pappi with meaning dad but that could be because we live in different parts of the US. I personally just hope that when all is said and done that the best interest of the kids is what matters to all people involved. I'm guessing that at some point that will not happen to some degree.