If You Were President.

I have no beef with illegal immigrants. I would sneak into the country too if I was living in Nicaragua and I'm sure you would too if you couldn't feed your family. BTW, the people who hate America are not these illegals, they overwhelmingly love the United States. In fact, a lot of illegals love and appreciate the country more than a lot of privileged suburban college kids who already have U.S. citizenship.

yes i would but they shouldn't be stealing my jobs and shit if they dont even belong to this country. that is straight up bullshit.

i doubt you like the fact that there are 12 million imagrants here.

well if they put a few hundred years into their country then maybe they could love and appriciate there own damn countries. i know i had nothing to do with this country being created and made great but i do greatly apperciate who did.

i also know i sound really ignorant, but hey thats me.

If I were President, first off I'd....

1) Change the National Anthem to Just a Gigolo (David Lee Roth style)
2) Make Redskin History a Standard Of Learning

then I'd do some real work and I'd.....

1) Eliminate federal tax for people making less than $25k/year and make those making up to 75k/year pay a flat rate (15%) and those making more than that pay a flat rate of 25% up to a maximum amount.
2) Make Welfare a temporary 12 to 24 month program.
3) Work on the legal industry's handling of frivolous lawsuits.
4) Increase funding for public education and provide an increase amount of attention on skill-type jobs. I really like the idea of doing away with 11th and 12th grade for anyone not interested in college but would rather learn a trade like electrician or plumbing.
5) Legalize everyone living in the United states effective immediately. This means you have to register to vote and register for Social Security. After about a 6 month period if you are in the country illegally you will be immediately deported back. the cost to send you back will come out of your pocket or you will work in some sort of government programs to payback the cost. During that time you can choose to undergo a legalization process (learning basic laws, language training, etc) in order to become a citizen.

And finally, I'd.....

1) Deport ArtMonkDrillz somewhere, anywhere.

yes i would but they shouldn't be stealing my jobs and shit if they dont even belong to this country. that is straight up bullshit.

i doubt you like the fact that there are 12 million imagrants here.

well if they put a few hundred years into their country then maybe they could love and appriciate there own damn countries. i know i had nothing to do with this country being created and made great but i do greatly apperciate who did.

i also know i sound really ignorant, but hey thats me.

I actually don't mind one bit that there are 12M immigrants here. I am the son of immigrants and everyone here is a descendants of immigrants. To be honest, I think immigrants do a lot of good for this country - they keep it from being stagnant by infusing it with new ideas, a solid work ethic, etc.

I don't know what the problem is with the media giants putting their bias into pop culture. That's the basis of free speech and free press. My first order is business is going to be the coolest President for the day ever. I would sit out on the front lawn like total trash and drink Keystone Light.

THEN I'd go inside and make some decisions. Creating custom teams USA and a custom team called "The World" in Madden, I would title each player a different country. Each player that I defeated would then be sent a box of Wheaties provocatively suggesting, "Better eat up if you wanna' hang with the big boys." Canada would be the punter.

After my tenth Keystone, I'd probably want to see some strippers so I'd smack my wife on the ass and tell her to make the call and to make me a sandwich while she was at it. If she refused, I'd remind her to call me Mr. President. The strippers should also refer to me as that as well.

Next, I would make some serious decisions about social security while soaked in Keystone and stripper sweat. Social security gets privatized while I'm in office and that translates to a lot of Keystone and strippers later in life.

Last thing I do before I leave my day as President is to rob the place blind and smack a Secret Service agent in the face because I could.


Have you ever seen the movie "Idiocracy" with Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph? It sounds like a movie that you can relate your candidacy too...

If I were Prez for a day I would do something to stop people from living off of the system, and try to help out the guy who is trying to make an honest living. It is unfair to see people who are on welfare have better lives because they are playing the system, and here I am trying to play by the rules and I get the short end of the stick. I work a full time job and my wife works about 30hrs/wk and we have 3 kids and we are just getting by, barely. Then I see people that are on welfare that use food stamps (Access card in PA) and load there grocery carts up with junk food and what not. Meanwhile I am just trying to buy the nessacary food for my family.

I have nothing against welfare, it is a good program if it is not abused. I will even admit that I had to be on it for a short while. But I did not do my best to stay on it. I wanted off of it ASAP!!! Maybe it is because I have too much pride but I was kinda embarassed to be on it, and now I see people all the time do just enough so that they dont loose it...

All I am saying is that the system needs to help the people that are willing to better themselves and society not the lazy, worthless, drug addicted, burden to our society type people...

what i don't like about illegal immigrants is that they can get some government services without paying taxes. If they want to be here fine, but they should be subject to the same rules as everyone else.

1. Stop treating China, India, other countries without EPA's or labor laws like equal trading partners.
2. Goodbye NAFTA..Mexico has been taking advantage of that for a long time.
3. Force prosecution of large corporations that hire large amounts of illegal aliens
4. Flood Afganistan with troops...lets not forget sight of why we're in the middle east in the first place.
5. Put more money into alternative energy sources.
6. Make agreement with middle eastern countries..."we will continue to buy oil, we will leave you alone, but if there are any more terrorist attacks, we will come down on you with everything within our power"
7. Push term limits in the senate and house.

1. Stop treating China, India, other countries without EPA's or labor laws like equal trading partners.
2. Goodbye NAFTA..Mexico has been taking advantage of that for a long time.
3. Force prosecution of large corporations that hire large amounts of illegal aliens
4. Flood Afganistan with troops...lets not forget sight of why we're in the middle east in the first place.
5. Put more money into alternative energy sources.
6. Make agreement with middle eastern countries..."we will continue to buy oil, we will leave you alone, but if there are any more terrorist attacks, we will come down on you with everything within our power"
7. Push term limits in the senate and house.

unfortunately with #6, you'll have a hell of a time proving where the terrorists came from and that said country was in any way involved in the plot, and for #7, the people that'd have to approve those limits are the very people that'd be hurt by them, so i don't really think it'd ever be passable :/.

a man can dream can't he?