Redskins Humor..

sandtrapjack · 10-21-2009, 11:02 AM

Q: Why was Jim Zorn upset when the Redskins playbook was stolen?
A: He wasn't finished coloring in it yet!

A federal judge has sided with the Washington Redskins in a lawsuit regarding the team's name. Sadly, it's the first major victory the franchise has enjoyed since 1991.

Washington's Clinton Portis defended Michael Vick, saying dog fighting was not nearly as criminal as selling Redskins season tickets.

And Finally.........

A guy walks into a bar with a Rotweiler by his side. The dog is wearing a Washington Redskins jersey and helmet, and is festooned with Redskins pom pons. The bartender says, "Hey! No pets are allowed in here! You'll have to leave!"

The guy begs him: "Look, I'm desperate. We're both big 'Skins fans, the TV is broken, and this is the only place around where we can see the game!"

After securing a promise that the dog will behave, and warning him that he and the dog will be thrown out if there's any trouble, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game.

The big game begins with the Redskins receiving the kickoff. They march down field, get stopped at about the 30, and kick a field goal. With that the dog jumps up on the bar, and begins walking up and down the bar giving high-fives to everyone.

The bartender says, "Wow, that is the most amazing thing I've ever seen! What does the dog do if they score a touchdown?"

The owner replies, "I don't know, I've only had him for 4 years."

saden1 · 10-28-2009, 11:26 AM

If you can't laugh at yourself who can you?

Q. What do you call millionaires sitting... around a TV watching the Super Bowl?

A. The Washington Redskins.

Q. ......What do the Redskins and Billy Graham have in common?

A. They both can make 90,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".

Q. How do you keep the Redskins out of your yard?

A. Put up a goal post.

Q. Where do you go in D.C. in case of a tornado?

A. To FedEx Field - they never have a touchdown there!

Q. What do you call a Redskin with a Super Bowl ring?

A. Senior Citizen

Q. How many Redskins does it take to win a Super Bowl?

A. We may never find out in the 21st century.

Q. What do the Redskins and opossums have in common?

A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.

SmootSmack · 10-28-2009, 11:35 AM

Gonna merge this thread with this one

http://www.thewarpath.net/redskins-l...ins-humor.html

GMScud · 10-28-2009, 12:35 PM

Anyone get the email going around with the .pdf attachment of the Redskins Funeral pamphlet? Oh man it's hilarious. I don't know how to convert a .pdf to an image I can post here, otherwise I'd share it.

firstdown · 10-28-2009, 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sandtrapjack

Those are really old actually.

Yea they just replaced the word Dallas with redskin.

doughtydoubter · 10-28-2009, 12:55 PM

i think this is pretty funny! especially the haynesworth one!

What the Skins Really Think | NBC Washington

GMScud · 10-28-2009, 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by doughtydoubter

i think this is pretty funny! especially the haynesworth one!

What the Skins Really Think | NBC Washington

Ugh. That's funny, but all in all, this is sad. Our team has become a total punchline. We are without question the Raiders of the east coast. An out and out joke.

RedskinRat · 11-03-2009, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GMScud

Anyone get the email going around with the .pdf attachment of the Redskins Funeral pamphlet? Oh man it's hilarious. I don't know how to convert a .pdf to an image I can post here, otherwise I'd share it.

skins_0001.jpg (image)

This?

SC Skins Fan · 11-03-2009, 01:03 PM

Stacks42 · 11-03-2009, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GMScud

Anyone get the email going around with the .pdf attachment of the Redskins Funeral pamphlet? Oh man it's hilarious. I don't know how to convert a .pdf to an image I can post here, otherwise I'd share it.

I do... I actually work for Adobe

CrustyRedskin · 11-03-2009, 02:16 PM

That is freeaking awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

SBXVII · 11-03-2009, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SC Skins Fan

Has this been turned into an avatar yet? My work laptop won't allow me to get to page 2 of the Redskins avatar's

tryfuhl · 11-03-2009, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stacks42

I do... I actually work for Adobe

nice

10-21-2009, 11:02 AM	#31
sandtrapjack The Starter Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 1,994	Re: Redskins Humor.. Q: Why was Jim Zorn upset when the Redskins playbook was stolen? A: He wasn't finished coloring in it yet! A federal judge has sided with the Washington Redskins in a lawsuit regarding the team's name. Sadly, it's the first major victory the franchise has enjoyed since 1991. Washington's Clinton Portis defended Michael Vick, saying dog fighting was not nearly as criminal as selling Redskins season tickets. And Finally......... A guy walks into a bar with a Rotweiler by his side. The dog is wearing a Washington Redskins jersey and helmet, and is festooned with Redskins pom pons. The bartender says, "Hey! No pets are allowed in here! You'll have to leave!" The guy begs him: "Look, I'm desperate. We're both big 'Skins fans, the TV is broken, and this is the only place around where we can see the game!" After securing a promise that the dog will behave, and warning him that he and the dog will be thrown out if there's any trouble, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game. The big game begins with the Redskins receiving the kickoff. They march down field, get stopped at about the 30, and kick a field goal. With that the dog jumps up on the bar, and begins walking up and down the bar giving high-fives to everyone. The bartender says, "Wow, that is the most amazing thing I've ever seen! What does the dog do if they score a touchdown?" The owner replies, "I don't know, I've only had him for 4 years."

10-28-2009, 11:26 AM	#32
saden1 MVP Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Seattle Age: 46 Posts: 10,069	Cheer Up If you can't laugh at yourself who can you? Q. What do you call millionaires sitting... around a TV watching the Super Bowl? A. The Washington Redskins. Q. ......What do the Redskins and Billy Graham have in common? A. They both can make 90,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ". Q. How do you keep the Redskins out of your yard? A. Put up a goal post. Q. Where do you go in D.C. in case of a tornado? A. To FedEx Field - they never have a touchdown there! Q. What do you call a Redskin with a Super Bowl ring? A. Senior Citizen Q. How many Redskins does it take to win a Super Bowl? A. We may never find out in the 21st century. Q. What do the Redskins and opossums have in common? A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road. __________________ "The Redskins have always suffered from chronic organizational deformities under Snyder." -Jenkins

10-28-2009, 11:35 AM	#33
SmootSmack Uncle Phil Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 45,256	Re: Cheer Up Gonna merge this thread with this one http://www.thewarpath.net/redskins-l...ins-humor.html __________________ You're So Vain...You Probably Think This Sig Is About You

10-28-2009, 12:35 PM	#34
GMScud Swearinger Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Washington, DC Posts: 12,626	Re: Redskins Humor.. Anyone get the email going around with the .pdf attachment of the Redskins Funeral pamphlet? Oh man it's hilarious. I don't know how to convert a .pdf to an image I can post here, otherwise I'd share it. __________________ Tardy

10-28-2009, 12:55 PM	#36
doughtydoubter Impact Rookie Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: the glorious city of DC Posts: 741	Re: Redskins Humor.. i think this is pretty funny! especially the haynesworth one! What the Skins Really Think \| NBC Washington

11-03-2009, 01:03 PM	#39
SC Skins Fan The Starter Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: South Carolina Posts: 1,555	Re: Redskins Humor.. __________________ It has taken a long time, but I have finally realized that nothing I say about the Redskins will have any effect upon anything the Redskins do.

11-03-2009, 02:16 PM	#41
CrustyRedskin Playmaker Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: RatherbeinDC, TX Posts: 3,062	Re: Redskins Humor.. That is freeaking awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Redskins Humor..

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