Smoot Lays the Smack Down

[Sheriff Gonna Getcha]

Smootsmack is out, and I've been tabbed to fill in. Here goes:

Receivers. Three of our five receivers dropped balls on critical third downs and, by my count, everyone but Devin Thomas dropped at least one catchable ball. This isn't rocket science, when the ball hits your hands, hold onto it.

Offensive Line. As GTripp pointed out, you've got the "offensive" part down. The running lanes were clogged, you guys drew those pesky yellow flags, and you looked pathetic in pass protection. If your objective is to see Jason Campbell sent to the hospital, go out and buy that "Mission Accomplished" banner.

Special Teams. Plack and Suishy. Sigh. It's too bad you won't be here in 2009, you both looked promising at points.

Zorn. You have shown us a lot of potential, but I'm starting to get a little frustrated with the playcalling. I realize your players aren't executing, but this offense is starting to become very predictable and one-dimensional. Also, as a coach, it is indeed your job to see to it that the players are executing.

Fans. You are the worst of the bunch. Your incessant whining is driving me nuts. Your lack of patience is laughable. Your inability to actually show up for games is driving me nuts. Moisture is not an excuse for failing to show up for a game. Oh how the mighty have fallen since the days of rocking the stands at RFK.