Chimp beatdown

THIS is a lot of...........chimp talk for a football site

[QUOTE=Trample the Elderly;527831]Why is it when Chris Rock makes jokes about a tiger biting Freud it's funny?
Why is it when Ron White makes jokes about a bear eating a guy it's funny?
Why is it when the Richmond Times Dispatch runs cartoons of bears eating people at the natural selection zoo it's funny?
QUOTE]

Comedy is a mystery, one that has been pondered since Aristotle. Nobody can explain why some people are funny and others aren't, we just kind of know this to be the case. So when Chris Rock makes such a joke it's funny, but when you do it's creepy and weird. When Jim Carrey farts in dumb and dumber its hilarious, but when my dad does it its gross.

While no one can explain why this is the case, the lesson to be gleaned is that you - Trample - should stop making jokes.

Perhaps, I asked some some people tonight what they thought about it. They know me better and thought the point I was making has funny. Maybe the internet takes the humor out of it. Maybe I was just being crass. It just made perfect sense to me so I wrote it.
Turns out this lady is sleeping with the chimp, gave it wine, and zanax. If that's not stupid I don't know what is?
Oh, when I was thinking of my tag I was thinking of our offensive line. I don't really advocate trampling the elderly. That wasn't just for you. Some others had something or other about it.
Do they still have Habu Sake over there or is it illegal?

[quote=djnemo65;527879]

Perhaps, I asked some some people tonight what they thought about it. They know me better and thought the point I was making has funny. Maybe the internet takes the humor out of it. Maybe I was just being crass. It just made perfect sense to me so I wrote it.
Turns out this lady is sleeping with the chimp, gave it wine, and zanax. If that's not stupid I don't know what is?
Oh, when I was thinking of my tag I was thinking of our offensive line. I don't really advocate trampling the elderly. That wasn't just for you. Some others had something or other about it.
Do they still have Habu Sake over there or is it illegal?


Fair enough. I think if the chimp had eaten its owner your remarks might have come off as less crass. The fact that it ate an innocent visiter is decidedly less funny.

Habu sake is from Okinawa and I assume sold pretty freely down there (someone was just telling me those snake hunters make bank) although I haven't run into it up here in the Kansai region. Have you had it? Is it worth tracking down?

I thought she was saying today that she never gave him Xanax. Who knows?

As for Trample, why he's getting so much attention here I'm not sure, but from a large amount of his parking lot posts he seems to be-or at least likes to play the part of-a sexist, xenophobic sadist who cares about no one and probably has few if any that care about him. Not to mention his profile (I actually think maybe he's an exterminator, like Uncle Jessie) Yet, at the same time he has some reasoned posts both in the locker room and the parking lot. But anyway, it'd be easy to see why people think he is a pretty crass, unfeeling individual. Who knows, maybe he is.

[quote=Trample the Elderly;527917]


Fair enough. I think if the chimp had eaten its owner your remarks might have come off as less crass. The fact that it ate an innocent visiter is decidedly less funny.

Habu sake is from Okinawa and I assume sold pretty freely down there (someone was just telling me those snake hunters make bank) although I haven't run into it up here in the Kansai region. Have you had it? Is it worth tracking down?

I had it in Iwakuni. I don't remember much after I did. Stick to the major brands. You never know what you're going to get.

I had a sense of outrage at the moron who owns the chimp. Because the chimp was there in the first place, the neighbor tried to help out and got maimed. That's bullshit. It's very similar situation for anyone owning a vicious dog.

However, to an extent I see TTE's point. If I'm the neighbor and I see a chimp going ape (literally) I'll stand back and watch from a safe distance. I'd probably call the cops to help, but if the chimp kills the owner, that's what she friggin gets. There's no way I'd risk my ass against a chimpanzee unless it was bearing down on my wife or kids.

I had a sense of outrage at the moron who owns the chimp. Because the chimp was there in the first place, the neighbor tried to help out and got maimed. That's bullshit. It's very similar situation for anyone owning a vicious dog.

However, to an extent I see TTE's point. If I'm the neighbor and I see a chimp going ape (literally) I'll stand back and watch from a safe distance. I'd probably call the cops to help, but if the chimp kills the owner, that's what she friggin gets. There's no way I'd risk my ass against a chimpanzee unless it was bearing down on my wife or kids.

Schneed, according to what I've read this is not how it went down at all. The victim was the owner's good friend. She had spent lots of time with the chimp in the past and often visited the home. So fond of and familiar with the monkey was she that this time she had brought an Elmo doll as a gift for it. She got out of her car carrying the doll and was attacked. For whatever reason, something triggered the monkey to flip out. The friend was not intervening in anything as the monkey was not attacking the owner.

This is at least what I have read.

Schneed, according to what I've read this is not how it went down at all. The victim was the owner's good friend. She had spent lots of time with the chimp in the past and often visited the home. So fond of and familiar with the monkey was she that this time she had brought an Elmo doll as a gift for it. She got out of her car carrying the doll and was attacked. For whatever reason, something triggered the monkey to flip out. The friend was not intervening in anything as the monkey was not attacking the owner.

This is at least what I have read.

I thought the monkey got out of the house with a key and the friend tried to help out?

update: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/19/nyregion/19chimpanzee.html?ref=nyregion

Just when you think you've seen or heard it all from moron land, here comes another:

Paterson, Sharpton slam NY Post chimp cartoon -- Newsday.com (http://www.newsday.com/news/printedition/longisland/ny-popost196040929feb19,0,7014832.story)