understanding a sexless marriage: Should I stay or go??

I remember when my wife and I were at the edge and things were not too good between us. We went out to dinner and had a talk. A nice long talk. We kept it from turning into an argument but we knew that by the time we went to sleep that we would get out what was on our mind first. Take her out somewhere so you all can talk. Don't show any anger just talk to her and let her know that you want you all to last but for you all to last you can't live in this limbo that you are in now. Ask her out on a date off some old young kids in love kinda thing. Take her out just to talk, or cook dinner at home with the candles and all but let her know you don't want to get it in. Just talk and spend time with her.

The key is to start a dialogue.

Solid, bro you need to come to D.C. and hang out man. We'll get you all straightened out brother. I mean if you want to. I'm not trying to wreck your deal, but if you need to get...you know...we'll take care of you in D.C.

Are you inviting him for some swingers action? Sure sounds like it.

What does the name 12thMan really mean?

Success in a relationship is usually found when both parties compromise and are willing to listen to the other's feelings....usually...

http://stewpig.com/wp-content/gallery/adwin/FUcomics40.jpg

This is a great, great comic strip. lol

SS84 - Apparently, all of your answers are in the ads above this thread. Some involve counseling and talking, along with hormone therapy and a new razor.

http://img248.imageshack.us/img248/9646/wpads.png

sounds like she either doesn't love you anymore or is having an affiar. if i were you i'd leave. why be married to a cold fish? there are too many other women out there that will give you what you want. just my .02.

Ok guys please dont laugh at me because i'm being brutally honest here:

she doesnt like her face being touched. I cup her chin sometimes to be playful.

I grab her butt when she isnt paying attention, and sometimes it makes her mad.

I have a habitually negative demeanor sometimes; i can be too overdramatic. For example, yesterday i was describing our recent drought (weather wise, not sex lol) to a neighbor, and i was telling him how lucky we were for the rain, because "people were near death" in my own words. Sometimes i say things like that and i honestly cant help it. it is so random.

every girl i've ever dated i've grabbed her ass when she wasn't expecting it and vice versa. i can not remember ever getting a negative response. that's a small way of being affectionate w/ someone you're dating/married or what ever. sounds like she's way too uptight.

every girl i've ever dated i've grabbed her ass when she wasn't expecting it and vice versa. i can not remember ever getting a negative response. that's a small way of being affectionate w/ someone you're dating/married or what ever. sounds like she's way too uptight.

Gonna have to agree with you. Solid, there's really only so much you can do. Granted, it's only been a month, but you still need to consider some things here before you waste too much of your time "trying" and you let good things pass you by. I'd stay don't give up on her yet, because you're married, made a commitment to her through the good and bad and right now is a test of the bad. But there comes a point (at which I'd say around 2 or 3 months) that if it continues like this and she keeps pushing you away, you need to stop beating around the bush and stop trying to approach it nicely and being like, "hey, it's been months since we've been intimate and you've been acting cold towards me lately... What's going on?" I mean work can only tire you out but SO much, you know and the last thing she should be doing is taking it out on you. She's as much at fault as you are (if you've been doing anything wrong, which I don't really think you have been)

I'm sure you love your wife and she's a very nice woman but just like you, I know she has to have sexual needs. Being tired and not feeling like it, shouldn't last for months and months. After 2-3 months it should start sending up red flags and you should either start talking to her seriously about seeking marriage counseling or start considering that maybe there's something not kosher going on behind your back. I'm around your age (a couple years younger, though not married) but I couldn't imagine not being intimate with my significant other for over a month. Honestly the first thing that would come to my mind, is that they were cheating on me... But then again, I'm the paranoid type.

Something's just not stirring the koolaid here... But I do wish you luck and hope you and your wife work things out.

I will say this if you decide to stay together then consider sleeping in separate rooms. It really isn't that big of a deal anymore as it seems more and more couples are doing it. You made a comment about how your wife doesn't like to be touched when she's sleeping so if anything this should at least help the both of you get some sleep. Doesn't mean you can't cuddle sometimes or anything like that instead it just helps both of you get some space.

Plus you don't have to worry so much about waking up your partner, covers being unevenly distributed, or snoring.

Anyway this explains it better:
Should Couples Sleep in Separate Beds? - DivineCaroline (http://www.divinecaroline.com/22074/74191-couples-sleep-separate-beds)

Still there's a part of me that strongly suspects she's having an affair. Part of me wants to say that I don't want to scare you but this story seems to be a little to close to your situation.
I no longer want to have sex with my husband (http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/ate/sexandrelationships/relationships/200325.html)

Are you inviting him for some swingers action? Sure sounds like it.

What does the name 12thMan really mean?

LMFAO!!! Hahaha

SS84 - Apparently, all of your answers are in the ads above this thread. Some involve counseling and talking, along with hormone therapy and a new razor.


That's inspired me to try a little experiment right here and now.

Man, if only there was a website where I could buy pogs and milkcaps. That sure would be swell. I would get the slammer and anything.

Then I would need to learn how to pickup chicks. However there's no website around that I can find to teach me. Man I really want to be a ladies man and have no fear of rejection.

I'd also like to learn secrets for World of Warcraft. Yeah, that would help me learn how to pickup chicks.